I live on a college campus, which has been abuzz with the energy that can only precede graduation. I Love ceremony like this. I always cry, no use trying to hold back. People look at me during some rite of passage, tears streaming down my face from behind my sunglasses, wondering what is wrong. My sheer inability to control my emotions is something I have come to love about who I am. It is just part of me.
Graduation is tomorrow morning. It is expected to be a glorious morning, sunny skies and mild temperatures (to make up for the polyester bags the graduates must wear). I will take my son and another little friend to hear the pomp and circumstance of it all. And…I will cry. I will watch all the parents and elderly grandparents file in, knowing that for some it was a challenge to get here: financial, physical, emotional. I will cry when students walk by with their dogs or their new babies. I will cry when a younger brother or sister runs up to hold the hand of their graduate. I will cry in anticipation of the day when my child experiences such an achievement. I will cry for the letting go I know I will have to do one day. I will cry for how hard life will be for my boy some days and for all the joy I know he will taste. I may even be crying now.
Tomorrow, I will arrive with pockets full of tissues and cheese sticks to keep to boys distracted from my waterworks. But if they see me, I will tell them that sometimes, my heart is so full of love that it spills out my eyes.
PS. My mom sent me a link to part of a graduation speech by David Foster Wallace. Thought you might find it interesting: http://www.upworthy.com/the-earth-shatteringly-amazing-speech-that-ll-change-the-way-you-think-about-adulthood-4?g=3&c=upw10