Today, like other days, I was Craving alone time. I woke up in a bad mood and felt grumpy most of the day. All I wanted was a little time to close a door and maybe snooze a little or take a nice, hot bubble bath. Instead, I didn’t sit down until 7:00 p.m. Cleaning the house, washing diapers, running errands, mowing the yard, fixing dinner. That was my day. After we ate, M and S decided to go for a walk and I was SO grateful. A few minutes on Fakebook…I mean Facebook…then off to the tub. No audience, no tub companions. And the water was REALLY hot. The only problem: after a few minutes I started to miss my family and kept listening for their voices to come in the door. I guess I am addicted to them (mostly to my boy…S and I do time away pretty well).
My mom is back in action after having her hip replaced 2 months ago. She came over today to hang out with M so I could get stuff done around the house. She mentioned that she is ready to start watching him more regularly. She said she and my dad would come take him for story-time at the local library on Thursday and then she could put him down for a nap. I told her that it was too much, too soon. She asked, “You don’t trust me?” I said, “No. I am not ready to be away from him that much.”
I have grown accustomed to our days together. We have a good rhythm going that makes me happy. I have been able to have M join me in a few of the things I do for me. He is great at stirring whatever concoction I am brewing in the kitchen. He has potted flowers and played in the dirt while I planted a garden. We go for walks and play in our fantastic yard. While S is at work, we are a unit.
I know it won’t always be this way and that it is good for him to branch out. I just don’t want to miss anything.